我14岁。我父亲从未信任我,我从来没有信任他。堵塞的时候在我的食物每一天,告诉他错了他生气了,告诉我它是在我的脑海里,坐在我面前的盘子里的食物和不让我离开直到我咬了一口。我咬了一口,假装吞咽之前在厕所里吐出来。我妈妈发现我哭了几周后,带我去了医院,我被诊断出患有自身免疫性疾病。诊断后我去问我的爸爸道歉(他自己不会这样做),他说对不起很冷漠,好像我是过于敏感的耸了耸肩。他指责我成为自杀后,在此期间他不会听我的。我母亲后来被诊断出患有癌症和我们接近的家人。我和爸爸从未在同一页,但她死后他变得难以忍受。它一开始跟他说这不是在公共场合适当的悲伤所以我不允许在我母亲的葬礼上哭泣。 After that we picked her a beautiful headstone, but a few weeks later he said we were picking out a new one. When I asked why he said it was because of money and we got her something that was ugly even for a headstone. Luckily, the guy who tried to sell it was a scammer so I got the one I wanted anyway. Then I got a boyfriend who is two years older than me and very kind. All the teacher's have nothing but nice things to say about him and he was extremely mature for his foolish classmates. My dad didn't want me to date period and especially not someone older than me and that was overprotective, but understandable until his mother told us he had high-functioning autism. My dad nodded and put on his respectable, understanding facade until we got home and he called him and his brothers trash. He later made a bunch of jokes with my aunt and uncle (who he told every last detail knowing they would agree with him) about how people with autism are (beg your pardon for language) "retarded" and how "his mother was obviously high-functioning too" because she was so stupid. I forced myself to laugh along with them, but I was dying on the inside. He found out I was still texting him and called me a "liar" and a "hypocrite" and said "You pull the wool over everyone's eyes but I see who you really are". I found ways to contact regularly regardless. Then I started seeing things. It got to the point where I couldn't tell the difference between my imagination and reality and I was always terrified. On top of this, despite the fact the doctors told my dad I had to be consistently screened to make sure my autoimmune disease didn't cause tissue scarring he canceled my appointment and I think he's canceled my appointments in the future for good because he still thinks it's just in my head despite me diagnosis. I told my dad the first day I was seeing things because it was so bad and so intense, but he told me "demons are attacking you" and "this is a reward from God" "Congratulations". I don't know what he meant by that. It's like my life is a sick game for him to play. Then when it kept happening and I finally worked up the courage to see my school Guidance Counselor, despite my pleads and warnings that I'd be punished, she called him right away. Everything was fun and calm when he took me home that day and for once I thought maybe he finally understood, but right before I went to sleep he told me I was selfish and only thought about myself and that I didn't care or watch out for the family that I didn't understand the value of family. He got me a therapist so he could tell the school he took me to one and then canceled all further appointments without telling the school. He said that God was punishing me for my lies and he wasn't going to waste his time and money. I've been scared to read the Bible ever since. Then a few days later on my dead mother's birthday right after we had visited her grave he took away my phone saying I needed to learn the importance of family. A few days after that he also took away my internet privileges. I had to trick him in order to get on here and write this. The guidance counselor asked me how things had went and when I told her they went badly she just shrugged and said she was sorry she had gotten me in trouble and didn't take any further action. I have told a teacher from my old school since and we are meeting up for lunch tomorrow to further discuss what actions are going to be taken. It looks like social services are going to get involved. I am very scared but glad I have taken this step, but the confirmation that I am indeed being emotionally abused would put me at much ease.