我只是把我的第二次施虐者。2014年我见到他的时候,他是如此甜蜜和爱,然后我开始爱上他的时候,他开始虐待饱满的情绪,他会离开和饮料,不回来或者我他回来,我将会害怕打,踢,拦腰抱住。我第一次离开是在2017年初,他追我的车撞的我最公共的地方在我们的小镇。我把对他的禁令,但在法庭上,他对法官说,他爱我,他不会伤害我。大约3个月后,他最亲近的叔叔去世了,我犯了巨大的错误,叫他给自己回他。这是同样的待遇。我觉得我已经有点控制饮酒,通过威胁离开,如果他走了出去。但这并没有持续很长时间。他开始喝重,在2018年1月使用可卡因。这是一个注定要失败。 A few weeks ago, he didn't come home. I packed up myself and the kids and we left. It was his house, me and the kids are currently staying at my moms, where tonight, I got woken up by my sister being drunk. It makes me feel like relapsing and going back. I even texted him tonight and told him how shitty he is to choose alcohol and drugs over me. Then I googled how to cope, and I realized that I shouldn't have done that because all the abuse that he gives to me and my children is far worse then my sister coming home drunk and loud. I'm grateful for things like this being available to read, it's part of my support system. I pray every day that I stay away and the wounds are still very fresh so it is still very hard for me to stay away. I'm trying.