嗨，我觉得在一个随机的网站上写东西真的很傻…但是我真的没有人可以倾诉。我还没被诊断出来。但我不知道我到底怎么了....我把压力内在化了一辈子。在过去的几年里，我一直在失眠、情绪波动、悲伤中挣扎....我不知道……我觉得自己很蠢....有些日子我很开心，但从来没有坚持过……每一天结束时，我都很伤心....我有两个年幼的孩子，所以我经常掩饰自己……不管发生了什么，情况越来越糟。我对人发火……我非常生气，我真的想伤害别人……我会有一些不健康的离谱的想法……可怕的是……当我处于这些阶段时，我不在乎后果……如果我感觉受到攻击，我就会立即反击……但我更喜欢杀人……当我这样的时候，我没有任何情绪。没有感觉…Sometimes it's feels like I have no heartbeat. I'm naturally hyper....But then I have days or even sometimes weeks where I'm just numb....I won't eat...I hardly would speak...Then I'm mean to my children when I'm in this phase ...And it hurts me....? ...I use to have answers for everything or if not an answer I would have a resolution...But now ...I'm so lost...Confused...Scared...Nervous...Angry...Sad alllllllllll mixed in one...I have really bad anxiety attacks to where I can't breath....I just don't know what to do as I can't lose myself because then my babies would t have a mother and they need me ...Help me please